Fun Times!

Well I had such a fantastic weekend! I went to a friends house on Friday with Lucia and just had fun. I hadn't done that in so long. We didn't do much besides hang out and watch some movies but I was with a bunch of people who actually made me smile so much! Saturday night we just went to a few parties and hung out...and then wound up coming home at a very late hour...we had went to Denny's to get some food with some friends. Actually I left my friend Keith's house because Lucia was going to meet a guy that she really likes at Denny's and she was scared to go alone...so she begged (well asked) me to go with her. She was there for me when I first met Mike cuz I was scared so of course I was gonna be there for her. And then we were at Denny's for like 3 hours. So that was another late night. Then yesterday I just sat around (slept till 3) and watch tv with Marisa. And then around 7 Mike came over and we talked forever on end. Well about an hour of that was just silent. But again I didn't get in till around 12ish. But now I am at work..just as bright as the sun. I have a date this Friday with a guy named Max. He is a friend of a friend. Also (and in the beginning I had no clue) that he was a friend of Mike's. So it's gonna be a little weird but I just hope everything goes alright because I really would like to get to know this guy better. He is way nice....we talk online everyday...and I am supposed to call him later tonight. But yeah...he lives in Long Beach...but is from La Canada and is coming up for the weekend...so he asked me out. SO I am way excited. I think that's about it! Love you guys!
♥Melody

The Story

I'm not really up for writing much but I will write some. Well Monday afternoon is when he broke up with me, over the phone, while i was at work. so that was bad. i knew he was going to do it...but I thought he would at least do it in person. Well I went to his house after work and talked a lot...he said he isn't ready for a relationship. And then finally after he brought me home I just sat at home and cried for a long time. Did the same thing on Tuesday. Except he came to meet me after work. Again we sat and talked and cried a whole lot....but I told him that if this is really what he wants then there is nothing I can do about it. And then Wedsnday he came over around 8 brought me flowers and said goodbye--i said goodbye and sat in front of my house until he left. Well he was walking around just crying (more then I was) and he fell and of corse I went over there. He was crying so hard and feeling so bad that he couldn't walk. So I went over there and he dropped his keys somewhere...so I helped him to the car and told him to sit in there and cry and I would find his keys. Well after looking forever I went and got a flashlight and found them. I brought them into the car and he was just crying. So I hugged him and just held him when he cried. I felt so bad for him. He feels so awful because he hurt me so bad. That's why he is saying he is so upset. Because all the things he promised me...to write me letters, to buy me flowers, to take me to the beach, to get me little cute cards....he did none of that. I did all of that for him and he just felt like shit. Well he was just freaking out so I went in the house and got him a glass of water and some tissue. When I went back out he was saying to me that he doesn't deserve that...that he doesn't deserve anything for treating me like the way he did. Well he drank all the water so I went and got some more. And this time I brought out a cold wash rag to put on his eyes cuz i'm sure they were hurting. Well after calming down for a little bit...he looked at me and started all over again. So he laid on my shoulder and I sang to him and finally calmed him down again. Only this time I told him he needed to go home and get some sleep. I didn't say good-bye again cuz i knew that would mkae him cry...so I only said I love you....but that is the last I talked to him. His dad called me yesterday seeing if he was at my house...I was freaking out because nobody had heard from him. But I called his house this morning and his mother said that he was at home. But besides that I am doing not so good. I can't hold food down...I don't sleep very much...I cry a lot, and out of the blue. Love you guys!

he broke up with me

Hi! Well I am way excited because i get to see my aunt erika, jackson, and grandma tomorrow! But besides that I am doing well. Nothing really to exciting has happened. Mike's mom went into rehab yesterday for drinking so he isn't doing to well. I don't really know what to say to him...I mean his mom seems a lot like my dad. And his dad reminds me a lot of my Mom. So i kinda know where is comming from...but all i can say to him is that i hope everything gets better. I know how hard it is..so that's all i can say. Love you guys lots!

♥mel

Well a lot of stuff happened this weekend. Me and Mike had planned on going to dinner and a movie on Friday night...when I got a call from his mom that afternoon she said that Mike and his dad had to move some stuff Friday night and that his sister and her were going dinner and I could go. Well I was all ready to go to dinner, and Mike picked me up around 8ish and was gonna bring me to his house to meet up with his mom. Well he wound up surprising me and taking me to dinner. He had his mom call me so it would be a surprise. I was kinda hoping he would buy me flowers or something because he were fighting lately...but I was all sad when he didn't. Well instead he bought me a cd that I have been looking for forever and have been unable to find it. I was so excited. We wound up going to City Walk and eating at Hard Rock, and went to see "White Noise". OMG it was so scary. He kept telling me "honey you are squeezing my hand to hard" I was really surprised because some of my friends told me it wasn't any good. I also bought the village and watched that. Antoher way wierd movie. Anyways....Saturday Lucia got her car back so me and her hung out a lot that night. And I stayed at her house...while Mike hung out with his friend. And then Sunday we all hung out and went to Hollywood...it was so nice outside! Well that was my weekend! Love you guys lots!

♥mel

So last night went pretty well. I was so nervous. I got to his house a little early, and waited outside because nobody was home. His mom and sister showed up and asked if I wanted to wait inside but I thought the fresh air would help. Well after an hour of waiting I knocked on the door and they let me in. I guess they were stuck in traffic and got home an hour and a half later then normal. Well when we started talking...he started out with "I don't think I am ready for this." And I was like fine. And he's like "No...not fine...say something." And I was like what am i supposed to say. if you don't want this i am not gonna make you stay with me. Then he went into he doesn't know what he wants. he wants to be with me, but he doesn't want things to stay the way they are. Yeah I feel the same way...things have been bad lately and a lot of things do need to change. So...after about 2 hours of talking I came to the conclusion that we will try to give each other more space and whatever else we need (we sat down and told each other exactly what bothers us about them). And if things don't get better in the next two weeks then we will call it quits. But I just hope everything gets better. He appoligized for everything he has down. He knows that it wasn't right and blah blah blah. And he said it's partly because he has never been in a serious relationship and he doesn't know how to act. So let's just hope things get better! Love you guys!

Grr...Boys Suck (Most of them)

Well in all good things there has to be a bad. This morning was not a good one. The day started out with my message from Mike saying "we need to talk" and from experience that is almost never a good thing. Well right before I left for work he said that he doesn't know what's going on with us. I asked him if we were breaking up and he said no. But still kinda hurts so i was crying. So after pulling it together so I could go to work, I keep getting messages from Mike. I don't really know what's going on with us. We spend entirely way to much time together...but we are taking more time apart which is nice. It has been feeling like we are married instead of dating, and I personally hate it. He feels smothered and I feel hurt. I understand that as much as I want to see him everyday, it's not healthy. So I have been trying to give him more space. So in one of him many text messages he said that he wanted to end it. Of course that upset me, but since I am at work I am not letting it effect me. On my lunch he calls me and tells me that he is confused and that he doesn't know what he wants. he wants to be with me but he just doesn't know. I always thought that if we were to break up with each other it would be me breaking up with him. He doesn't know what he wants from this. So I am going over to his house after work. I dont' really know what to say. I have done everything I can to make him happy. I am somewhat happy. When we first starting going out everything seemed to be great and I just don't have that feeling anymore. But I am happy. (He keeps telling me that I am not, but I was like dude you have no idea what I am feeling). He tells me that he loves me and would do anything to make me happy, but the last month it feels like he isn't doing anything. You know what he got me for Christmas. Nothing...well he did but he ran out at 11:30 Christmas eve so I had something to open. I know that it doesn't matter, but it hurts you know. I just don't know what to do anymore. I want to make it work because I like being around him. Maybe not as much as we usually do. I guess hopefully things will work out, but I know if they dont' I will be ok. I think that I am slowly going crazy. I cry a lot more. For a while I hardly cried but now it seems to be a daily thing again. I need help!!! Ok love you guys!

Nothing new this weekend. Just sitting around being bored at mike's house! just wanted to post a picture of me and him from a while ago...but i finally got it into the computer! Love you guys!

No Subject Pt.2

Nothing new here really. I am trying to do better at blogging more often then I used to. I guess though there is not much going on right now. Tomorrow is 3 months for me and mike, and i'm not sure what we are doing yet. It feels like it's been much more then 3 months. It kinda feels like we are married and it sucks lol! I mean when we first started going out it was all exciting cuz we didn't see each other that often and it was something new everytime we got together. and now since we are always together, it's like the same thing everyday. we are starting to take more time apart from one another which is great. like the other night when i had to clean. and tonight i am staying home because he is going to the studio with his friends, and although i like watching him play...it's kinda loud and boring. I just dont' know lol! Glad to hear all is well with everyone. Everyone has updated recently which is great. I keep checking adam's blog and i'm not sure why...he never posts. Anyways...love you all very very much! Good night!

Spring Cleaning!

Well last night was quite the night for me. Between laying around and doing nothing and cleaning my room I was busy all night. I finally got my whole room cleaned. I washed about 4 loads of laundry (including the load that is going to good will) and got myself a bit more organized. Although I don't know how long it will last (hopefully until after grandma leaves). I don't have much other stuff to talk about.

There was a drive by shooting not to far from our house about a week ago. 1 kid was killed and the other in critical condition. they both went to adam's school as well. it's kinda sad that you have to hear about stuff like that.

That's about it...here is a better picture of Mike if anyone cares to see it. Erika and Grandma will get to meet him very soon. We were planning on going back to Michigan in Feb. but I don't think it's gonna happen now. I want to go back soon though. Anyways...love you lots...and as soon as I get the chance and the scanner is working I will scan in a picture of me and him together.

Mom-Also I will scan in those pictures of Brit. for you sometime. Love you lots!

Happy New Year!

Well it's officially the new year for 3 days now! And yet nothing exciting is yet to happen. New year's eve went slightly well. We went to a party at a friend of our's from baseball for like 10 minutes before Mike got mad and wanted to leave. Well I talked him into staying and then when we went back in Aunt Adrienne said it didn't matter if we left so I gave in and was very rude and told him it was time that we left. Well the whole way home (to his house of course) I didn't say two words. I was so pissed...I was hoping he'd be a bit less shy this time and talk but No he said that he was bored and didn't wanna be there. So what did we do instead....nothing we went to his house and did nothing. Grr...boyfriends are so aggravating. But besides that all is well. Grandma and Erika are coming soon (so that means I have to do some spring cleaning) my side of the room is a disaster so I will accomplish that this week hopefully. No for sure I will because I hate it being like that! Anywho...that's about it! Love you guys!